Whatever happened to Felicia

She sure as hell couldn't puill off some hit like this..
Now growin up i watched Oprah, especially when it stared to air on South African television, moms would put that shit on and i'd have to sit through it, I didn't really mind, not like when your parents would change the channel while the Simpsons played to watch the news.See unlike the news Oprah didn't piss me off, she made sense to my kiddy world, The news, not so much. Talks of rate cuts, strikes, new presidents, all that stuff didn't affect my rule as king of the playround, and watching the Simpsons made me a more likeable king, fresher than any prince.

Remember when Tom stopped being box office gold

Fractured, would be the best way to describe the country during those times, even though we had made the leap out of the old regime. Seeing Oprah gave a young darkie hope, she was taken ultra serious by the white world. By white world i mean the housewives of America, they hung on to every word this woman threw at them, and we all know housewives are the ones who run households. A sweet whisper from your wife will have you buyin curtains on a saturday, instead of watchin rugby with the boys and knockin a few back, if you don't comply you'll end masturbating to videos of air sex till you get your mind right. Oprah had thenm eatin out of her hands, she said some shit about beef, next thing beef sales dropped dramatically.She was in their heads.You a struggling author? Fuck it get on that Oprah bookclub list ,and you're guaranteed to be spending some Harry Potter money too. She made Obama acceptable.

we all know who's tune he dances to

 She had it all. My mom would forgive all my indescretions if i was to get on the Oprah show, she'd record that shit and play it everytime her friends came over. At some point though i stopped caring bout Oprah, she had her minions and they'd do anything she said, it all became too cultish for me. 25 seasons in, and she's caling it quits, and  to celebrate the last season Oprah, gave her audience, all 300 of them a seven day trip to Australia all expenses payed for.

"So I started to think about where would I most want to go," she said over the din of an audience that suddenly understood they were going somewhere far away.
"Maybe I should take you all with me to the other side of the world. We're going to Australia," Winfrey shouted.
With that, a mock-up of a Quantas Air Lines jet rolled onto stage, its door opened and actor John Travolta, who also flies airplanes, stepped out dressed as a Quantas pilot.

bow in the presence of greatness

Yeha well turns out Australia is gonna foot the bill, Tourism Minister Martin Ferguson, said," Oprah is a household name and her star power has the potential to lift Australia's profile as a premier tourist destination. We spent hundreds of millions of dollars over 30 years without much effect, I must say that honestly. The publicity that Oprah will bring to Australia around the world is something you couldn't buy."  Oprah runs the world people she goes deep too. Getting a counrty to take three hundred ppl on holiday to the tune of  U.S$2.8 mill, Australia should help out with some of our striking workforce. Oprah should be a terrorism target, she really pulls all strings. Now Australian tax payers dance to her fiddle.
Pity i'll never be part of the audience to win some free shit, scrap that off the bucket list.


No one man should have all that power



L.G