Friday, January 20, 2012

Khloe Kardashian might be O.J Simpsons daughter

I’ve never wanted something to be so true before in my life. This would just be the icing on the cake for the Kardashian clan. We all know that the Enquirer has been known to stretch the truth, but you don’t need 20/20 vision to see that Khloe is just “built” a little different than her sisters. Kim and Kourtney are built like cheerleaders and Khloe is more like a middle linebacker. Could OJ’s Heisman Seed™ be the reason that Khloe can bench press 400lbs?

Let’s break down the Kardashian clan…..

Kris Jenner. Momma Kardashian. Is she using the same plastic surgeon that Michael Jackson was? It’s hard to compare noses with Khloe due to all the fucked up plastic surgery she’s had and at this rate she’ll be rocking the M.J. surgeons mask around town if she doesn’t stop going under the knife.

Robert Kardashian. Defended OJ during his trial. Died from cancer at the age of 59. Has probably rolled over in his grave 1/2 million times after seeing what his family has turned into.

Kim Kardashian. What a great story. Started off hanging around Paris Hilton. Met Ray-J and he filmed himself smashing her cheeks from the back then sold it to a porn company. Kim gets famous for laying there and taking loads to the face and the rest is history. A true entrepreneur. Looking forward to the day that a kid falls out of her vagina and mommy gets to explain how she became famous. Google doesn’t lie. Check our her nose – straight from her dads mold.

Kourtney Kardashian. Certified MILF. You look at her and Kim and you know they are sisters. Same nose…same hair….equals same daddy.

Khloe Kardashian. Now here is where things get interesting. Check the nose. Much flatter than both of her sisters. Oh, and you’re about 6 inches taller than the rest of your family.

And then you put all three together and it’s a game of “which one doesn’t belong”….someone ain’t telling the truth!

I’ve narrowed it down to…..

The Juice™. Probably the luckiest man walking the planet. I remember being in high school watching him put on that black glove that didn’t fit. Bet the prosecution wishes they could turn back the hands of time and never ask him to put that glove on. They lost that case the second the glove only went halfway up his hand. My trained eye took a look at OJ’s profile and I could see where maybe, just maybe, his seed is responsible for that 5ft 10in beast known as Khloe Kardashian.

Let me just say I lifted this straight from, H8TORADE, the breakdown was so good I dare not alter it.


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